An open letter to medical students and residents

I replied to a tweet yesterday by Dr. Chioma @DrZobo on Twitter. She talked about finding time to enjoy your life and create wonderful memories outside of medicine. My response was to reiterate her point and to further explain how medicine can take so much from you and you miss out on life.

I’m making this post to elucidate further on what I mean. Medicine turns you into some sort of recluse and you miss out on forming great relationships and building good social capital. You need to understand that there is a method to the madness of medicine. There is a strategy to being successful in medicine and in other areas of your life.

The first thing you need to work on is your mind. Know that it has been done successfully before and you will also get through it. Having a positive outlook helps you to get through all the bad days (and stressful exams).

The next thing is the kind of associations that you form. You need to be deliberate and intentional about forming forward thinking relationships. The people you form relationships with will determine how easy medical school and residency will be for you. Form associations with people that contribute positively to your life and not with people that are parasitic. You don’t need that kind of extra baggage in medical school and residency. Let it be  mutually beneficial relationships. Where you are deficient, let the other person be more than sufficient and vice versa especially when it comes to your relationships. Don’t be the most intelligent in your group. It makes you feel like a local champion and in no time, complacency will start to set in.

If you’re versatile, it is a good thing. But please, do NOT multitask to the point that you forget your primary goal which is to get through medical school first. If you can handle other things like writing, making music, art along with medicine…by all means, do so. If you cannot and you find yourself falling short in your primary assignment, give it a rest. You will continue later. There is a time for everything. Too early and it may come with catastrophic consequences.

I have always loved writing. I have been writing on Facebook for years. But I write so much more now (everyday) because…well, I can. The key to becoming a better writer is to be consistent with writing. Writing gives me as much joy as dermatology does and it is my escape place. I have paid my dues. I was a fantastic resident (if I can say so myself😊) and I never took my duties lightly. When I was going to write my final exams to become a consultant, I moved into the hospital for three months just to do some focused reading. Anything I do in life, I like to put in my best so that I know that even if I fail at it, it would not have been for lack of trying on my part. I know some people wonder how I find time to write so much and some don’t even like it (which doesn’t bother me one bit) but I have gotten my fellowship already and nobody can take that from me.

Dear medical students/residents…When I say not to let medicine take everything away from you, I was particularly referring to your relationships and all the little things of life. Don’t forget to live while you’re doing medicine. Build your social capital…it is the strongest currency that you can have. Find joy in the little things of life. Take time out with your friends, travel and see the world. Never forget your family and neglect them to the point where you lose the connection with them (especially your spouse). At the end of the day, utmost joy is found in the little things of life.

Like my mentor Prof Ogunbiyi says, “to know, you have to read.” There is no shortcut to passing an exam. You must read. You put in your best and then hope for the best. As a medical student and resident, I did some catering and I never failed any exam. But this was because I could cope. One of the fastest ways to fail is to compare yourself to another person. No dullard gets into medicine, but our level of intelligence varies. My approach to reading couldn’t have been like my friend Femi who only has to hear or read it once and he doesn’t forget. Yet, some of my friends could not be like me who spent all her free time cooking for others yet never failed an exam. Know yourself and “to thyself, be true.”

If you fail an exam, don’t wallow too much in self-misery. Failing an exam doesn’t mean you’re a failure. I have people that were my juniors in medical school that finished residency before me and those that were my seniors that I finished before them. We all have our own finish line.

I can say all these….because I have been there. Nobody becomes a specialist without going through the motions. Don’t forget to live, love, laugh and make the best out of your life.

But remember, “the heights reached and kept by great men was not attained by a sudden flight. But they, while their companions slept, were toiling upwards in the night.”

There is no shortcut to succes. Commitment, consistency and dedication are the key ingredients. Wishing you all the very best.

And don’t forget to breathe…nothing lasts forever. Not even you 😊